I'm off to more training starting at 3am tomorrow. I don't think I'll be able to update till I get back in three weeks.
I was hoping for an easy day today and to get off early so I could pay bills online and get some other letters and emails done before I leave. Of course it doesn't happen. I got finished work about 5:30, having to do some shit.
I really am looking forward to being my own boss oneday. If I had more control over my life, I'd do things so it wouldn't waste so much of my time. A lot of the times I think people in the army have to work harder because of poor planning.
Some Officers annoy me. I had to do this bogus project today because officer requested it. I don't mind the work, but the way people go about doing things, sometimes just makes unecessary work for you.
Not going to complain anymore about work because i signed up for what I got. I've come to realize that other peoples negatives attitudes have really been unneedingly infliencing my own attitude.
My goal for this upcoming training is to not focus so much on what is wrong, but to make the best of it. People can complain as much as they want as to how bad things are in their lives, but I realized today things could be so much worse. It is ignorant myself not to see that. I know I'm better than that. I look at how I started this entry and already I realize as much as I just need to vent sometimes, the things I am complaining about really have little weight. Just because something meanial seems to matter, doesn't make it important.
People have to look into themselves sometime and realize some of their menial problems aren't that big and don't really matter. Not to say there aren't genuine problems that people do face, just that when you think about it, how many of peoples problems are really problems. I often think what is in the upper echelion of problems... the first thought is death and illness followed by problems in love such as betrayal or loss of love.
Recently I looked at what some problems of mine has been. Most of it has revolved around work, which is natural to want to vent, but I have my life and my stepmom is doing better and I do start to realize that the other things aren't close to those things and I should stop putting them on par with those problems.
I notice this in myself and in others that we all tend to dramatize our problems. Blogs are great examples. The other day I was reading old entries and I realized looking back now things weren't that bad. In perspective of your lows it really isn't that close.
It's kind of early to start a New Years Resolution, but I think what might help me these few months is to focus more on what i have and try not to let the small things get in the way.
I know it is going to be a challenge. I am sensitive person, who likes to laugh and joke things off, but I allow things cut a lot closer to the heart than I'd like. I plan on still joking, but honestly I am kind of tired of the joking, it can turn mean spirited. It often hides truth which has been on my mind as of late.
So as I go on hiatus online for 3 weeks, in my daily life I am going to try to focus less on the negatives and just work through things and not try to laugh things off.
I might pick up my written journal. I miss writing in it.
On another note, a friend of mine got out of the army today. I am very happy for him. It really was a bad situation here. I'm going to miss him, but I think he'll be really a lot better off and it is good to see something positive happen for someone.
A new member to our office has come into the midst this week. It was somewhat unexpected, but I think it is a good thing. Personally I enjoy the enfusion of new blood. This girl is straight out training just like I was in Dec. last year.
It kind of reminds me of where I was and where I've been so far on this journey. There still is a long way to go.
I'll end on that note...till probably sometimes in Thanksgiving.