Maybe it is my depression cycle right now. I tend to get low emotionally from time to time. I am a lot better at handling it as I've gotten older. I don't fall to pieces anymore like I used to. I am not really upset about anything, which is a good. I just notice I can't be happy all the time and my emotions tend to go through cycles. I just go with them now.

I sitting here listening to Jackie Gleason, wishing I was in another time. They really don't make music like this anymore. There is such a story in it, and there are no words. That is what I love about music.

I wish I was in the pitch night sky falling to the ground, hearing the wind whip past my ears and the clouds brushing past my face as I fall towards the moon lit reflection on the sea.

I have odd fantasies. It is not a destruction fantasy, it is a descending one.