I don't know maybe I am being overly sensitive but I think some things aren't cool to do to ex's, and some things aren't great to rub in, to your last hookup. I didn't think Viva could do any more to me, but apparently that isn't true. During lunch today, she was rubbing in my face, her Valentine Card to her "now" Boyfriend. I guess it isn't a big deal but she really was making it such a big deal and such a spectacle and didn't seem to even think that it might be a tad tacky to do it next to a guy whose heart she broke over this guy.

I guess maybe my views are slanted and I am overly feeling. Me, I would have done things differently had the shoe been on the other foot. I just wouldn't bring it up or draw attention to it, being that I was sitting right next to them. If it's a card that I'm working on, well I wouldn't draw so much attention to it. She litterally had the I love you so much part, which was the outside of the card sitting right in front of me for 5 minutes.

I don't know, I don't care that we're no longer seeing each other and I am actually happier without her, but I still know I lost her and she didn't choose me and I guess that still hurts my ego, and I guess I don't want to have that rubbed in my face. Her doing something like this is one of the reasons I am happy I am no longer with her. She just doesn't think about how her actions affects others.

It bothers me greatly that she told me after we broke up that the most important thing to her was our friendship. Since then I have not heard or spent any time , even if we were friend I think we can hang out after time had passed... and it has and I don't want to be with her but yet she seems to hardly be able to utter words to me or even talk to me.

I guess that's how love goes sometimes. This may be non valentine spirited, but this Valentine I am happy I am not with a girl who would likely continually mistreet me and take for granted my love for them. It's far better to be seperated than dilluted by love for a person like that.

God that sounded bitter. Have I gotten that bitter? Perhaps? I don't know. I am not mad, I am just dissapointed in what a poor choice I made. I choose someone and one of the important things to me is that the person is such a great hearted, giving and thoughtful person. I just wonder how well I identify those qualities in people. It makes me upset that I made such a huge error and allowed myself to love into such a bad situations. I feel like I am wasteful with my love and pour it recklessly spilling the juices of my passion.

I guess I need to let that go though...