I thought to myself, come on people. You know we live in a warped world when a self proclaimed pop princess is hated more than our time's Hitler. I mean lets see on one side we have someone who has been blessed with a lot of good fortune based upon her looks, and on the other side we have a ruthless dicatator who has tortured and has had countless killed. Can you really compare?

I saw this special interview with Jermaine Jackson about....what... the weather? No, of course not. I still don't really know anything certain. I think at the very least, Jermaine really cares about his brother. With all the negativity surrounding all this, the thing that strikes me, is just seeing something done out of love. A brothers love. It sort of made me think, I sometimes wish I had a brother, I wish there was that kind of love existed for me. THose of you with siblings, i think there is such possibility for a really great bond, it is a shame that some waste that opportunity and connection, it can really mean something.

I am tired, I had a long day back at work. I've been listening to a lot of old Janet Jackson songs lately, it's interesting to listen to things I really liked years ago.

Well I bumped into Viva, she gave me a hug. I hate to say this, I may be out of love with her, but I still have an sexual attraction to her. Sometimes I want to turn that hug into a long passionate kiss, not out of love but out of simple attraction or lust. Sometimes I think if I really wanted to, I might be able to make it happen once. In the end it would only lead to guilt and regret for her. I do still care though and won't make anything like that happen. I will do the right thing but I don't think I am going to act as if I am oblvious to what my more carnal emotions desire. Obviously we had the chemistry, and things didn't end happily ever after for who knows what reason, it just didn't. Doesn't ever take away that there was something there.

I had my Ben Affleck moment, when I fell for my Jenny from the Block.