I feel like apart of me has died or has been phased out. I think it really bothers me that I don't feel the same. I haven't been the same since Viva and I started to see each other. Don't get me wrong, I love being with viva, despite the stress she brings, because she does make me smile and I am happy when we are together.

Last night I found myself longing for my days in my Manoa Studio. That was the loneliest time in my life. Odd that I would miss that time in my life. I realize that I was oddly more happy there than I ever realized.