My stepmother had surgery today. I didn't make it home, but not much can be done to change that.

She is doing well, from what my father told me. That is all that really matters. They were able to get the tumor out, and from what I hear, it went really well. I hope the news stays on that pace.

Thanks to people who offered their kinds words and support. Perhaps when i do get home, things will be a little more upbeat and hopeful..

I look forward getting home soon. It can't seem to come soon enough.

I was talking to my friend last night about praying and God, of course things like this brings you back to that ever contstant question of God and existance.

I've been told to pray a lot...I haven't prayed a long time and honestly I couldn't bring myself to just start praying cause I wanted something. I don't want to pray unless their is true faith behind my prayers. If there is a God, I don't want to be a fairweather believer...only believe when good things come to me or when I want something...

I am in a weird place religiously. I think my heart is in the right place, but most religious people might be confused by me... I act as if I don't believe, yet I try to live as if I do. I follow my heart and i'm living life like a ship sailing the various currents of the sea.

It is lame to say this and might sound corny, but I really feel like one of those people who never felt I quite fit in any convention except one...the floater and wanderer. It doesn't bother me so much. You meet a lot of interesting people this way and though it can be lonely at times, it can be quite fulfilling if I allow it to be.