An interesting thing happened today, I said to someone in response to something they said " so what, did you go Skinny dipping?" I was flirting with this girl and then I made that stupid statement. I'm such a flirt, I love to flirt. Anyhow one of the girls asked, "why have you?" I actually have gone skinny dipping and another time I was with Zack and Stacy who went together. They wanted me to come too, but I thought that the three of us naked might be weird. It was before they started to go out and I thought this probably would be a good moment for just the two of them, that could bring them closer. Am I good or what at judging situations. I'm gonna give myself kudos for being such a good friend and cupid. Thank you, Thank you! So when I mentioned that I had, most of the girls were all shocked and super interested. Actually one girl seemed to give me that look, like wow you're hot, you're the dangerous guy. I read people really well and I am not being vein. It is funny because people tend to react as you think they might. I honestly think my gift as a human, is reading people. The only time It is uncertain is when I have emotional attachments that cloud my senses. Of course whenever most people get emotional they completely lose perspective. I think it is funny to see a girl fall for a guy, cause she thinks he's dangerous or seems exciting, when in reality we are all the same with only moments that make us stand out. I have seen a quite a few fall for that with other people. It is kind of sad cause most of us all live normal and boring lives. There are a great deal of people who get swept up in the appeal of danger. Unfortunetly our lives can't be an episode of real world, with drama at every hour. At best we can try to mix it up, but for the most part life if far to constrictive to live completely out of control. People who try to live that life, have probably the hardest time. You can live that way but I think the reason we don't is cause it is such an emotional drain. People can only take so much emotional trauma. This girl who seemed suddenly interested in me is not the brightest bulb in the package. I respect all people and see them as humans, but I don't think I could ever settle down with a person I didn't find somewhat intellegent. Brains do matter. I want as usual, a balance of brains, beauty, and heart. I think that I am a lot more free in my outlook than most people, I think my job is harder for me than it is for others because I am the type that really wants to express myself, but etiquette and our stupid new Greet serve and thank policy makes it difficult to be honest and straight up. I always believe that tact is a wonderful skill but sometimes you just don't want to bite your tongue. There are times I really want to tell people to open there eyes and get there heads out of there asses. And excuse me goes a far way, instead of ramming the person with your cart. Instead I am supposed to fake smile and thank them for hitting me with their carts repeatedly. I think I am a passionate person and even my fantasy of retribution are pretty heavy and scary. I have never let my anger physically manifest itself on people. I more or less have these images of what I'd like to do and usually direct it at inanimate objects. I sometimes get so angry with some people, I go in the back and imagine getting my handtruck and swinging it at the Crappy Customers. Not just a tap, but with anything I'd do I would give it all I had. Guns are such a cop out. Deep inside I would love let my darkside out and destroy. Like I said I think it is my creative and passion wanting to surface and not take shit from people. It is my chaos side, my animal nature. Luckily the logical part of my mind has always been in control and keeps all of that in my imagination. I always understand when people lose it and do something horrible. I take full responsibilty for myself though and I always take myself out of the situations when my buttons are getting pushed. And I always direct my frustration or anger to an object, and time does the rest. With most things, time heals and difuses. My mother and father both have awful tempers. THey are a lot worst than I am. My father actually broke his hand, from hitting a guy repeatedly and i have seen both of their tempers. I have beat them though, I have that same temper but I really control it completely better than they ever could. By seeing what it does I realize that is not what I want to be and I control and direct it and I don't hold it in but like I said I direct it so it does come out, but not all at once and not at anyone. I guess in some ways I have made up my own anger management. I truly do not believe in physical violence against people even if they deserve it.

Now that you all think I am this angry freak guy. I just have to say that I don't always feel this upset or angry. I am quite normal and a very happy, but life presents so many tests and like everyone I deal and do my best to not hurt anyone and deal with my feelings. Going back to the skinny dipping though, it was something that needs to be well planned. I went out with my cast in a play I was in, after a show. There were 3 guys and 5 girls. We went to this beach, but once we got in the water it was so rocky underneath and the water was very rough. Kind of stupid of us but we went in any way and most of us ended up with cuts on our feet. That is my skinny dipping story. I think there are things like that in life that people should try. Just let it all hang out!