Ok Well it has been some weekend, I can tell you. Friday night was the least eventfull, I worked. Saturday rolls by it was a pretty important night for me. For the first time I saw a play that really spoke to me. Actually I saw 2 plays that night. Yes two. The day was filled with another blur of a workday. The evening I went out with Zack and Stacy. My ex roomie who I am starting to spend more time with. It has come to my mind that I need to find some new friends or else at least get used to being alone when going out to do things. So we went out to a Thai restraunt. I have a hard issue when it comes to food and Stacy. She is a Vegan and well I can eat anything but seafood. NOT a big fan of seafood. So I always try to cater to her because I want her to eat. NOt so she gets fat but so she looks a little healthier. She suffered from an eating disorder and deep down I worry for her. I'd eat anything so she'd have a choice so she could eat. But I try to do it in a way that doesn't make her know I'm doing that. I really wish she'd decide on eating places only because I believe more in enjoying the company and choosing the restraunt is secondary, sure there are number of places one would like to go but that is only secondary and not even that. Dinner was nice and I got her to choose and there were things for her to eat. We went to see a play version of Lysistrata. Actually there was someone I was looking forward to seeing it with but perhaps it better just as well because I didn't really like it. I'm not sure what it was, the script, the material, the direction. I'm not a conseritive guy when it comes to sex, trust me I have painted a picture with my friends in which they think I have a dirty mind. Part of me does but most time I realize I put on these shows for my friends, I guess I enjoy entertaining people and making them laugh. Though I am no puritan I realize my bark is stronger than my bite. Anyhow I found this play to be midly entertaining with only a moment of true humor. My explanation to my friends was that it simply had too much sex. It left nothing to the imagination. It was simply too bawdy and I could see through it like I can see through myself puting an act for my friends. It is exactly the jokes I'd employ to easily get a laugh from my friends. I found that deep down I didn't think It was funny, yet people laughed, as they would as if I were telling a similar joke to my friends. Perhaps it is the cruelest joke of all, that a man who can make people laugh by giving people the funny they want, who can no longer find that same material funny any longer. I'd watch old Marx Brother films, they were funny. Many of the things that made people laugh in their films are done still to this day and even done before them. Enough of Lysistrata I will move on to "Crave". I decided to go to crave a late night show here that runs at 11pm. I dropped off Stacy and Zack and returned to the theatre. They were tired and are not theatre fanatics like me so I went alone. I went alone and felt alone. I didn't see one person alone there, trust me I looked I had lots of time while all the couples or groups talked to one another. I saw many people I knew but I was and felt very alone that night. I was feeling very dark that night but I felt proud that I had the courage to stand and be there alone. Not that this was some great accomplishment, but for me this was a start. The play spoke to me and how I had been feeling not only tonight but lately. It was a play dealing with love and loss and I think even human action and instinct. It had a great deal to show about our pain as humans and how we hold on and even in most cases seek it out. It showed how through love we destroy ourselves. The words simply rolled into my heart and touched me that someone was able to put into words, that someone really saw and felt what I had been feeling. I had almost thought no one felt as I did, and truly understand. Nothing is greater than finding that voice that says what yours is saying. I knew it had to exist but up until now I hadn't found it. There were speakers and movers. THe movers were a guy and a girl. THe girl, Mariko, was a young girl I knew. I assisted directed a show she was in and I was sort of the elder type but not really. I saw her before she grew into the woman she is now. When I met her, she was an attention craving child who simply wanted to be noticed, but aren't all like that and some of us still are. But there is definetly a change. I still see a little bit of the old Mariko there but I see much more strength, confidence, and growth. I see an identity has emerged for her to lean back on instead of the attention of others. She still craves the attention I am sure but she seems more in control rather than it being in control of her. It was disturbing to see the live and re-inacted sex scenes and eventual rape scenes in person. I have seen on stage nudity before. But there was nothing fake about it, short of showing actual penetration it pretty much pushed it to the edge and the desire was there and it was shown. As an actress she has far excelled from me. I believe within me lies the ability to do what she did but she actually did it and It puts her into another level. In life you can do anything but it doesn't count until you do it. THe words though were amazing because as gripping and drawing as the visual aspects of it, the words were still heard and focused on, over the show of nudity. It even transcended the interest in the visual aspects. Truly powerful and great. I sort of saw heart to a piece and realized that too exists.

Ok now to Sunday. I worked again all day. I feel myself only growing more tired from a long week of school and work and outside activities. I went home and took another shower and I ate like a very guilty person. I ate a Jumbo Jack, Bacon Potato Wedges, A med drink, 2 crispy tacos and , yes and, and a egg roll. What a weekend. Well that was my weekend. I'm tired and my fingers hurt... from typing. Bye